Columbus11

To those of you waiting on commissions they will likely be a little late as I've recently come down with a nasty spell of food poisoning which has made doing anything that requires serious concentration impossible. The worse is past but I'm now playing catch up. Secondly, I am going back to University for my Masters in less than two weeks, so thats taking up my time now too, but it also means that people who paid for commissions last week and from now on won't be seeing them until after I'm back and settled at uni on the 16th.

Just letting y'all know.

Basically, for the last few months I hit a massive writing wall unfortunately. I've come to realise that I am unable to stick to any commitments or timeframes that I might muster. I've got hundreds of comments and notes asking me to do different chapters and its all, well, overwhelming. Chapters that people having been asking for years lie unfinished, simply because I just can't summon the passion to do them. This isn't because, I'm working to much, or because I'm busy having a social life, I have plenty of time in which I sit down and prepare to write some more. And, I just sit there, and I sit there, cycling through chapters trying to decide which one to continue. Then, after an hour an half or so of trying to write, I just give up. My Sta.sh is filled with half finished chapters where I simply ran out of steam, or I didn't like how it sounded, or sometimes I woke up and suddenly didn't want to write anymore. 

Unfortunately, the longer this goes on for the more I feel like I'm letting people down, hence the more depressed I become, hence the less writing I want to do. The only reason I'm doing this journal post is because I know sometimes these help inspire me for a short while. 

Some people may say that you shouldn't worry about what other people want, you don't owe them anything, you should do what you want to do. Problem is, I don't know what I want to do, I need some direction. I've got 463 pages in my gallery, many with chapters and potential chapters still to do, and I just don't know where to start. 

In the end, the passion is dying, and I don't know how to carry on. Or maybe thats just the anxiety talking. 

Sorry to have to write this guys. I thought that summer would give me ample opportunity to write but I'm afraid life had other ideas. Well, not life exactly. I came home from uni with my grandparents both in the hospital. Now, sadly, they've both passed away. Mourning is long and difficult, and the funeral has taken almost a month to arrange due to costs and it being a busy period at the crematorium. Family is having a hard time of it right now, and being with them is more important than writing now.

Additionally, I am eventually heading back to uni to study for a Masters degree in Welsh History, so there's that, but that needs finance.  So I'm also looking for work over the summer and will be invested in that. Honestly, if I could make money from these writings I would, I just can't think of how that'd be viable in anyway on this platform as the whole thing kind of functions by people being free to leave suggestions. So don't worry, thats not a avenue I'll be going down anytime soon, I think.

Frankly this whole situation and other pressures has left me pretty depressed. I've got half a dozen half finished chapters which I just can't bring myself to finish, though they'll be there waiting. I made a lot of promises about new schedules and everything but right now, I think that when I do come back, I'm going to be doing chapters I really want to write and that will hopefully ease me back into it.

Columbus

Yeah, I know I don't actually have 200,000 views yet, but I got a lot of stuff to talk about and I don't want to get rid of this entry in a few days when I do actually hit 200,000 views, sooooo early celebration. Lets all hope there's no extinction level event that occurs before then and thereby making me a presumptive idiot. 

Now its been a while since I posted and ages since I said I was looking for long term suggestions as to what storylines to pursue and I laid out this whole plan as to how it'd work. Well I've been inundated with a load of suggestions and I've randomly selected five of those storylines to run with until either I reach a natural end, or I get really tired; whichever happens first. Once their done, I'll move on to the next lot of suggestions that I have. 

I've listed below the storylines that I'll be working on in the upcoming month and perhaps a little beyond that.

Mountains of Ruin Storyline
Harry Potter Storyline- With primary focus on Queenie Goldstein
Lilith's Demon Village
Lilith's Selective Transformations
Mutation and Lars in the Future Storyline

I released the beginnings of each storyline tonight to prematurely celebrate 200,000 views and to make up for a lack of recent content. Fortunately I have now finished my final year as an undergraduate at university and summer is now here, so hopefully that'll leave more time for writing. I originally planned to finish these much earlier, however me and my family have suffered a pair of grievous losses in the last few days that will still take time to fully recover from; I'll do what I can though, whenever I can. 

Again though, thanks too all for sticking with me. Thank you to all my watchers (I think its 475 now), thanks to all those people favouriting my work and thank you to everyone for the views. I don't make any money from this, so my only motivation to produce this many pages is down entirely to you guys. Finally, if you have anymore suggestions as to what story branches you particularly want to see, feel free to send me a note.

So recently I've been able to do a fair bit of writing, mostly focusing on the suggestions that people left on my last diary entry. I've been doing this by using a random number generator to pick out which story-line to follow; unfortunately this means that some people's choices haven't been picked at all, while others have been picked more than once. Additionally, I've only been able to add one or two chapters to any particular story line so far, and as some one who completely lacks any self-confidence I'm always looking to be validated by other people's ideas, but at the same time I don't want other people to think I'm intentionally ignoring them. Furthermore I'm now in my last semester at uni and things are undoubtedly going to heat up soon work wise, so I may not be able to keep up a healthy writing pace. 

So, I've decided to plan for the long term. So once again, I'm asking for your suggestions as to what chapters or story lines you want to see continued. It doesn't matter if you've already posted on my last diary entry, I want to hear it again, it can be absolutely any story line, demons included, though the more specific you are the better, cause some story-lines like goblins or demons had hundreds of different threads. But please keep in mind, the more ideas you post the harder its going to be for me to complete because lots of other people are going to have suggestions. I'm just one man (sometimes two) and my chapters tend to be around 3-4 A5 pages long so there's only so much I can do.

Once I've got your suggestions, I'll organise them into random different writing blocks (with each block comprising of 3 or 4 suggestions) which I will then focus on for a unspecified amount of time (I can't commit to an accurate time frame, cause life work, but I'll just keep going until I feel like I've done enough). Once I'm done with one block, I'll move on to the next block of suggestions and so on. This will mean that there will be less variety in the chapters I'm posting for quite awhile but hopefully it'll mean more story-lines get conclusions or they'll at least get added to a great deal. 

Whenever I do a new writing block, I'll post what story-lines that block includes so you guys can all see what I'll be working on.
Sometimes people may be disappointed with the story-lines that I'm doing cause they may not be that interested in them, but unfortunately I can't please everyone all the time and I have a decent sized audience to cater to, however I understand if some people just decide to drop out or stop watching for awhile. 

Hope I explained that alright but if you've got any questions feel free to ask me in the comments below, and give me those suggestions! please...